Evaluation of btnharmony paper by melloyello
Personally I would prefer to use the plural "they" and "them" instead of "he/she" or "him/her". It just flows smoother because the grammar wouldn't distract you from the paper. It also avoids really really picky feminists who complain about it being "he/she" versus "she/he", but that's not a big deal. Then you could also get rid of the "victim(s)" with just "victims".
Your paper does a lot to explain how punishment works, but when addressing rehabilitation, it seems you just say that rehabilitation doesn't do this and is too lenient. Rehabilitation isn't supposed to work the same way that punishment works, and I think it would be helpful to address how rehabilitation is supposed to work and why it doesn't work that way. For example, punishment may be more objective than rehabilitation, but rehabilitation isn't supposed to be impersonal.
Don't take my criticisms too personally. It's a great rough draft, and I think if you take some of these suggestions and the other guy's suggestions, it'll be a great paper. melloyello
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- btnharmony last edited on 11 June 2005 at 10:23 am by aforte